Hello Fascination
by BbyWhoresnop
Summary: Alex and Jay are tired of their mom nagging, and are looking for a place to move. They're looking for a place that has night life for Jay, a place for Alex's son, Jesse, to play, and some place exciting and new. When theWhat better place than Santa Carla?


Hello Fascination  
>Chapter 1<br>Already Gone, Bitch.3

**Alex's POV**

Jay and I sat with a map in front of us on the bed. We needed to find the perfect place to stay. Such a long, monotonous, tedious process. I would point at a place on the map that had a cool name, he would come up with a reason not to.

"Uncle Frank lives in Mississippi, so nowhere there."

"Too many stuck up people in New York."

"Texas is just too hot."

We're never going to get done if he keeps this up. After a few more towns and states getting knocked off the list, the phone on my bedside table started ringing its annoying tune. I rushed to pick it up before it woke Jess who was taking a nap in his playpen at the end of the bed.

**Jay's Pov**

I watched Alex pick the phone up quickly. As she talked to the person on the other end, I half-heartedly listened to her side of the conversation.

"Yeah? How's that going? Really? You know Jay, Jess, and I are planning on moving, right? No, we have no idea where. Hopefully somewhere far away from here. Oh my God, Erica, you're brilliant! Okay, love, talk to you later!"

So it was Erica. Erica moved to somewhere in California a few months ago. I couldn't for the life of me tell you what its called. Santa Carlos or something like that.

"Jay, you're not gonna believe this! I just found the perfect place for us to live, and it'll be completely free!" She said quite loudly.

"Stop shitting me sis. Really?" I couldn't bring myself to believe a word of what she was saying. Free? Nothing is free.

"I'm not shitting you! That was Erica, she said Santa Carla is amazing and she would love for us to come visit. I told her we were looking for a place to live and she said we could stay with her!" I could practically feel her excitedness rolling off of her in waves. "Oh, Jay, its perfect! She was telling me that the house she's renting is huge and she would be more than happy to let us live there for free! Santa Carla has a huge boardwalk with rides and everything, plus, it's right beside the ocean! This is amazing!"

"Well..shall we pack, sister?" I said with a huge smile. Finally, something was going right!

"We shall, dear brother!" She giggled.

I ran off to my room to pack my stuff. I had four suitcases. I tossed all my clothes that I wore into the bags, packed a few pictures of Alex, Jess, and me, and went back into Alex's room. She'd already got her stuff packed and was working on Jesse's. She looked to be on the phone with the UHaul company, so I shooed her away and started packing Jess's stuff. Since our suitcases would fiit in the back of my truck, I imagine the UHaul is for Jess's toys, crib, high chair, etc. I went downstairs and folded up his highchair and sat it by the door, along with his toy box. I would get his playpen after he woke up. Alex probably didn't want him running around in a bad mood while we were getting stuff done.

**Hour Later**

We were done packing and had everything waiting by the front door. Alex is gone to get the UHaul. It isn't a very big one, it's the kind you can just attatch to the back of your car or truck. But, it's big enough to fit some of Jesse's things. That's all we really need to take.

Erica was going to let us have the whole upstairs to ourself. It comes with three bedrooms and three bathrooms. it was fully furnished. Since Alex feels Jess isn't quite old enough to sleep by himself, we're going to use the third room as a play room.

This was going to be a bit different. Our whole lives, Alex and I have had nothing. And we always assumed that's all we would ever have. We've always shared a room. When Jess was born, I forced mom to clean out the attic so I could have my own room. I love Jess to the Sun and back, but for the first six months of his life, he had colic _really_ bad.

My sister is the strongest person I know. I would have never been able to handle that. She's always so sunny and bright. I know it's an act, but she makes it quite believeable. If we weren't so close I would have believed it. I remember the nights mom would yell at her. I remember her staying in the bathroom for thirty or fourty minutes at a time. I remember the night I finally figured it out. She was only thirteen. I was fourteen.

_Flashback_

_I covered my ears as I heard my mom screaming at Alex. Why didn't I step in? Why didn't I tell her to stop blaming Alex for something that wasn't her fault?_

_We were supposed to be watching our cousin, Aryana, while mom was at the casino with our aunt. Mom called from a phone at the casino to remind us not to let Ary fall asleep because we didn't know if Aunt Madison was going to take her home. But it was late and Aryana was fussy. Alex was getting tired and irritated with Aryana, so I told Alex to put Aryana to bed. We would wake her up when mom pulled in the driveway. What could go wrong? _

_I was tired, so I went on to bed. I asked Alex if she could stay awake for a couple more hours by herself. She insisted she could. But she couldn't. I found my self restless, despite being so tired earlier. I got up and got food._

_Mom came in as I was in the kitchen. I never heard a sound. But I hear, oh did I hear, when she saw Aryana and Alex asleep. _

_"I'm going to beat your motherfucking ass! Now, I told you don't let her go to sleep and you deliberately disobeyed me! Now i'm going to have to stay up with her ass all night!" I heard her screams. They drowned out Alex's quite sobbing. This was almost an everyday thing. Alex was always doing wrong in my mother's eyes. _

_"It's not my fault! You weren't here while she was in the middle of the floor screaming! You weren't here when it was three o' clock in the morning and she's getting hungry, but we have no food because you spend all your money gambling!" I was proud of my sister for standing up for herself, but when I heard a loud 'POP!' I wish she hadn't._

_As she ran down the hallway into the bathroom I could already see the crimson handprint on her cheek. _

_She stayed in there for God knows how long. It seemed like an eternity. When she finally came out, eyes puffy and red, she plopped down on the bed with her back to me. She didn't say a word, so I did. _

_"Show me your arm." She froze._

_"Why?" I saw her pull her sleeves down a little more._

_"Alex, I already know, just let me see how bad."_

_"I don't know what you're talking about, Jay." She stood up to walk away. I grabbed her hand and pulled her back, careful not to touch her arm. I pulled her sleeve up gently. There were about seven scars and four new cuts. I gasped. They weren't just scrapes, they were gauges. I don't know how she was alive. Tears sprung to my eyes. _

_"Promise me, Alexandra, that you will never do this again." I demanded. _

_"I promise." She whispered._

_End Flashback._

I know she's done it again, but not as bad. A little nick with a razor here or there. I've done it before, just to see what kind of release she got from it. I saw then that I had asked too much of her. It became addictive, even to me. When I got mad or upset, my arm would go numb and it seemed the only way to make it stop was to take a knife of razor or pair of scissors to my skin.

Then I learned about the Butterfly Project. Basically every time you want to cut, you draw a butterfly in the place you want to cut and name it after someone very special to you. If you cut ANYWHERE the butterfly dies. You must let the butterfly fade naturally. No washing it, no excuses.

It's pretty brilliant. It stopped me. I mentioned it to Alex, but she just blocked it out. She has such a bad habit of doing that. She blocks out anything she doesn't want to here. There's no point in telling her she has to go somewhere or do something if she doesn't want to. Cause she just pretends you're not there.

Despite all her mood swings and her issues, I love my sister more than anything or anyone. There's no doubt about that.

My train of thought was cut off by Alex jumping on my back. Speak of the Devil and the Devil shall appear, right? "If you're coming to California with me, you better start helping, cowboy." She smiled.

"Wouldn't want that, now, would we?" I winked and threw my arm around her shoulder. "Come on, little sister."

We started loading things into the UHaul and truck. Our stuff took up more space than I thought it would. But we soon finished and mom was pulling in the driveway. Alex and I glanced at eachother. It was understood that neither of us wanted to confront her. So we pulled off without a word.

"Where the hell are you guys going?" She yelled after us. But we were already gone.

I saw Alex lean out the window and flip her the bird. And that was that. We were on our way to a better life.


End file.
